The Old Prospector

An old prospector walks his tired old mule into a western town one day. He’d been out in the desert for about six months without a drop of whiskey. He walked up to the first saloon he came to and tied his old mule to the hitch rail. As he stood there brushing some of the dust from his face and clothes, a young gunslinger walked out of the saloon with a gun in one hand and a bottle of whiskey in the other.
The young gunslinger looked at the old man and laughed, saying, ‘Hey old man, have you ever danced?’
The old man looked up at the gunslinger and said, ‘No, I never did dance. I just never wanted to.’
A crowd had gathered by then and the gunslinger said, ‘Well, you old fool, you’re gonna’ dance now,’ and started shooting at the old man’s feet. The old prospector was hopping around and everybody was laughing.
When the gunslinger fired his last bullet, he holstered his gun and turned around to go back into the saloon.
The old man reached up on the mule, drew his shotgun, and pulled both hammers back making a double clicking sound. The gunslinger heard the sound and everything got quiet. The crowd watched as the gunslinger slowly turned around looking down both barrels of the shotgun.
The old man asked, ‘Young Fella, Did you ever kiss a mule’s ass?’
The gunslinger swallowed hard and said, ‘No Sir. But I’ve always wanted to.’

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The Clown Car Ran Out of Fuel

So every morning and every evening me and 7 other dudes load up on these electric golf carts with 4-person trailers to make the long ride into the bowels of the airport. It is ridiculous. They go about half the speed of other traffic (so the catering trucks and blue toilet water suckers are always passing us and giving us the bird as they go by), and since we only have two of them, we have to wait until they are full, so we wind up waiting around a bunch of the time because there always seems to be one or two people straggling behind. (I think this was some sort of cost savings initiative- or maybe just an evil plan to further humiliate me in life, not sure)

Anyway, yesterday, we ran out of juice about half-way out there. We pushed it off to the side and waited for FEMA to rescue us. We were stranded.

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The Economy. Your Money. Real Answers.

I sat in the audience of Dave Ramsey’s big high-tech broadcast tonight. I didn’t know what to expect before I got there, but I was impressed, encouraged, and inspired. Not only does Dave have things figured out for himself, he is a leader and seems to care about helping others.

He gave a brief history lesson of Keynesian economics, then explained some of Milton Friedman‘s work. He says there are three important things that have made the US great (or maybe it was the economy great, or maybe capitalism) 1) Economic Freedom, 2) Political Freedom, and 3) Moral Restraint. We have not been so good at the moral restraint part, and this has caused many problems.

Dave gave three things that we need to change in order to turn things around for the better:
1- allow failure (yes, failure is an option, and it will run you toward excellence)
2- relearn the word NO (no, we are broke, so we can’t buy a new house; no, you are 17 years old, you don’t need a new Corvette, etc)
3- take personal responsibility (you run your own life and are responsible for everything in it)

He followed up a question/answer session by giving three things to take action on:

1- Get up and take action – You are the cure, America. No one else is going to solve your problems for you—that’s your job! Find out how you can take control of your money, turn back the fear in your community, and hold your representatives accountable for the decisions they’re making on your behalf.
2- Stop listening to loser talk – We’re sick and tired of the “loser talk” that has permeated the media, the water cooler and the internet. Stop listening to the garbage, and start speaking a word of hope!
3- Start giving – Learning how to give—whether it’s money, time or support—changes your whole mindset. Dave says it pretty clearly: “We can’t win if we can’t give.” If you want to win with money and change the nation, you’ve got to learn how to give again.

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Miss USA Gay Marriage Question

Here it is broken down, plus the gay judges feelings afterward.

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FreedomWorks and Tea Parties

Quick and simple explanations about what the tea party movement is about. (stop spending so much money, stop borrowing so much money, and stop bailing everyone out)

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Yes We Can Magic

AlfanZo doesn’t pick the PC softsale in this one!

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Zen of Sarcasm

01. Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty much leave me alone.

02. The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and a leaky tire.

03. It’s always darkest before dawn. So if you’re going to steal your neighbor’s newspaper, that’s the time to do it.

04. Don’t be irreplaceable. If you can’t be replaced, you can’t be promoted.

05. Always remember that you’re unique. Just like everyone else.

06. Never test the depth of the water with both feet.

07. If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of car payments.

08. Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you’re a mile away and you have their shoes.

09 . If at first you don’t succeed, skydiving is probably not for you.

10 . Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day .
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Garden Update – April 19, 2007

I worked outside all day today while Amber and Bryson were visiting family. First thing I noticed was that two plants I thought were dead are coming back to life. This made my day. The first is my Brandywine tomato that I started from seed, and over watered. It looked like a brown stick last week, and now there are little green buds forming on it.

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Dallas Tax Day Tea Party Slideshow – Set to Queensryche


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TTU Economics Experiment

received via the InterWeb -BG

An economics professor at Texas Tech said he had never failed a single student before but had, once, failed an entire class. The class had insisted that socialism worked and that no one would be poor and no one would be rich, a great equalizer. The professor then said ok, we will have an experiment in this class on socialism.

All grades would be averaged and everyone would receive the same grade so no one would fail and no one would receive an A. After the first test the grades were averaged and everyone got a B. The students who studied hard were upset and the students who studied little were happy. But, as the second test rolled around, the students who studied little had studied even less and the ones who studied hard decided they wanted a free ride too; so they studied little.. The second Test average was a D! No one was happy. When the 3rd test rolled around the average was an F.

The scores never increased as bickering, blame, name calling all resulted in hard feelings and no one would study for anyone else. All failed to their great surprise and the professor told them that socialism would ultimately fail because the harder to succeed the greater the reward but when a government takes all the reward away; no one will try or succeed.

Our poor children. They are going to hate us.

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