Actions Speak Louder Than Words, Mr. President‬‏

Posted on July 1, 2011 by Brian Gallimore

YouTube – ‪Actions Speak Louder Than Words, Mr. President‬‏.

And now, a few words from our Vacationer-in-Chief…

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Best of RODNEY DANGERFIELD’S ONE-LINERS

Posted on June 30, 2011 by Brian Gallimore
  • I was so poor growing up … if I wasn’t a boy… I’d have had nothing to play with.
  • A girl phoned me the other day and said, “Come on over; nobody’s home. I went over. Nobody was home.
  • During sex, my girlfriend always wants to talk to me. Just the other night she called me from a hotel .
  • One day I came home early from work … I saw a guy jogging naked. I said to the guy, “Hey buddy, why are you doing that?”  He said “Because you came home early.”
  • It’s been a rough day. I got up this morning … put a shirt on and a button fell off. I picked up my briefcase, and the handle came off. I’m afraid to go to the bathroom.
  • I was such an ugly kid…When I played in the sandbox, the cat kept covering me up.
  • I could tell my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and radio.
  • I was such an ugly baby…My mother never breast fed me. She told me that she only liked me as a friend.
  • I’m so ugly…My father carried around a picture of the kid who came with his wallet.
  • When I was born, the doctor came into the waiting room and said to my father, “I’m sorry. We did everything we could, but he pulled through.”
  • I’m so ugly…My mother had morning sickness…AFTER I was born.
  • I remember the time that I was kidnapped and they sent a piece of my finger to my father. He said he wanted more proof.
  • Once when I was lost, I saw a policeman, and asked him to help me find my parents. I said to him, “Do you think we’ll ever find them?” He said, “I don’t know kid. There’s so many places they can hide.”
  • My wife made me join a bridge club. I jump off next Tuesday.
  • I’m so ugly…I worked in a pet shop, and people kept asking how big I’d get.
  • I went to see my doctor. “Doctor, every morning when I get up and I look in the mirror…I feel like throwing up; What’s wrong with me?” He said…”I don’t know but your eyesight is perfect.”
  • I went to the doctor because I’d swallowed a bottle of sleeping pills. My doctor told me to have a few drinks and get some rest.
  • With my old man I got no respect. I asked him, “How can I get my kite in the air?” He told me to run off a cliff.
  • Some dog I got. We call him Egypt because in every room he leaves a pyramid. His favorite bone is in my arm. Last night he went on the paper four times – three of those times I was reading it.
  • One year they wanted to make me poster boy for birth control.
  • I’m so ugly, when I was born the doctor slapped my mother!
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Why Are Conservatives So Mean?

Posted on June 30, 2011 by Brian Gallimore

Andrew Clavan explains some truth to college graduates:

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The Fast and the Furious – Mexico Grift

Posted on June 30, 2011 by Brian Gallimore

I’m told this spot is funny, but our own agents have been KILLED by this program. Stewart makes jokes, but all this is real. Our government is selling guns to drug dealers that are then using those guns against us.

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How BOOBS Got Their Name

Posted on June 30, 2011 by Brian Gallimore

This educational diagram takes me back to my college years… when I took a drafting class and learned about drawings and viewpoints.

No need to thank me….

just trying to keep friends informed and educated.

 

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Voted for Obama?

Posted on June 28, 2011 by Brian Gallimore

A humorous sign:  (irony of criticizing idiots with a sign containing grammar mistakes is not lost on me)

“If you voted for Obama in 2008 to prove you weren’t a racist, you’d better vote for someone else in 2012 to prove you’re not an idiot!”

 

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Bunk-Bed Assembly

Posted on June 27, 2011 by Brian Gallimore

I was greeted home tonight with a 4-year-old doing some sort of celebration dance and singing a made up song “I’ve got a bunk-bed!” over and over.  I really had no choice but to get right to work putting it together for him.  I think it took longer to empty out the 8 boxes it came in!  Bryson was a big help, and in the end he performed the celebration dance again on the stairs.

Bryson is daddy's helper

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